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“Contact with another person is a basic biological “Contact with another person is a basic biological need; loneliness is a form of starvation.”

This quote is from the book Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski & Amelia Nagoski (which I recommend if you have not read it already).

We don’t shame ourselves for being hungry or thirsty—yet when we feel a longing for connection, we often label it as “too much,” “needy,” or “clingy.” Somewhere along the way, needing others became something to hide.

But the need for emotional connection is wired into our biology. When it’s unmet, we feel anxious, disconnected, or depressed. And instead of recognising this as a normal human need, we often turn inwards with blame.

The truth is, there’s nothing wrong with needing connection. It doesn’t make us 'weak' or 'needy'. It makes us human ❤️

#emotionalneeds #selfcompassion #innercritic #selfworth #emotionalsupport #therapy #relationalneeds #relationships #couplestherapy
When we operate from a place of caring about other When we operate from a place of caring about others for so long, we sometimes lose touch with what we want or need. 

Choosing ourselves can feel unfamiliar, even uncomfortable at first. But noticing the signs that we’re choosing ourselves more often — like setting boundaries, saying no without guilt or overexplaining, or listening to our own needs — can be reassuring. It reminds us that we’re on the right track 🌱

#selfworth #choosingourselves #mentalhealth #emotionalwellbeing #psychology
People-pleasing is a relational pattern. It doesn People-pleasing is a relational pattern.

It doesn’t shift just because we try to change our thoughts or behaviours.

Real change happens in relationship -
where we stay connected, feel safe, and still say no. Where we’re disagreeing, differing, or not complying — but not losing connection either.

If this resonates with you, feel free to read my blog for more reflections (link in bio) - or reach out to see whether therapy might be a supportive next step 🌱

#peoplepleasing #boundaries #selfworth #relationalhealing #therapyjourney #mentalhealthsupport #emotionalwellbeing #healingpatterns #codependency #nervoussystemhealing #peoplepleaser #therapyhelps #selfabandonment #onlinetherapy #relationaltherapy #therapist #psychotherapist
Sometimes, no matter how much we want to change so Sometimes, no matter how much we want to change something outside of us, change doesn’t happen. Circumstances may stay the same; but we evolve, we change… and that matters 🌱

#therapist #counsellor #mentalhealthawareness #emotionalwellbeing #selfgrowth #innerchange #selfreflection #personaldevelopment #mentalhealthsupport #changestartswithin #growthmindset #selfacceptance #mentalhealthmatters
Some conflicts can be worked through. Others might Some conflicts can be worked through. Others might highlight a deeper incompatibility. But either way, how we show up in the moment can shape what happens next. 

Moving through conflict might mean:

🌱Taking a pause instead of reacting right away
🌱Speaking from our own experience, and vulnerability
🌱Lowering our shield and being curious
🌱Tolerating the discomfort
🌱Holding space for more than one truth
🌱Staying emotionally connected, even when it’s uncomfortable.

And ... It’s okay if the resolution doesn’t happen in a single conversation. Sometimes we need several discussions, even over several days or weeks.🌱

Feel free to bookmark or share this post if it feels relevant to where you are right now.🌱

#conflictresolution #relationships #emotionalintelligence #therapy #therapist #psychology #psychotherapy #psychotherapyonline #conflictmanagment
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What is self-care looking like for you today? 🌱 So What is self-care looking like for you today? 🌱 Something I keep reminding myself is even the smallest  acts of care makes a difference.
A reminder for anyone who needs to hear this… 🌱 A reminder for anyone who needs to hear this… 🌱
It is good to know what to expect 🌱 It is good to know what to expect 🌱
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When we say, “I don’t mind, you decide,” we don’t When we say, “I don’t mind, you decide,” we don’t actually offer much for the other person to truly connect with.

We might think to ourselves that we are being kind, but what’s not talked about enough when it comes to people-pleasing is this: 

Every time we push our own needs aside, we add just another brick to the wall between us and the other person. 

When this continues over time, we disconnect from ourselves as well as the people around us.

This might be because we have an underlying belief that connection comes from always agreeing. 

Breaking down this invisible wall starts with small steps. It comes from showing up as ourselves, with our preferences, our opinions, and our voice.

Do you find it hard to express what you want? 

Here are some questions to help you reflect on your own experience:

⭐What fears come up when you consider expressing your needs more openly?

⭐How might your relationships change if you allowed yourself to take up more space?

If you'd like to explore this in a supportive space, therapy can be an excellent platform. 

#selfawareness #relationships #peoplepleasing #innergrowth #selfworth #emotionalconnection #communication #boundaries #selfreflection #mindfulrelationships #couplestherapy #psychotherapy #psychotherapist #emotionalintelligence #emotionalwellbeing #cigdemberrettpsychotherapy
Do you ever wonder if your relationship might bene Do you ever wonder if your relationship might benefit from couples therapy?

Couples therapy can support any relationship, not just those in crisis. It can be especially helpful when:

✨ There are frequent arguments over seemingly small things.
✨ There are no arguments at all, but a sense of drifting apart - an underlying emotional disconnection.
✨ Disputes keep resurfacing and never seem to get resolved.

Seeking therapy doesn’t mean your relationship has failed. In fact, many couples wait too long before taking the first step - according to research, on average, delaying by six years. Incredible, right?

If any of this resonates, it might be time to explore support. Visit my blog for resources for couples or reach out to see how we could work together.

#couplescounselling #therapy #emotionalfocusedtherapy #trransactionalanalysis #couplestherapist #onlinecounselling #relationships #emotionalliteracy #emotionalintelligence
As humans, we have a relational need to be emotion As humans, we have a relational need to be emotionally ‘found’. This simply means that we need to feel seen, heard, and accepted for who we are. 

But sometimes we may have learned to hide parts of ourselves to stay safe.

We might hide behind a smile, behind perfectionism, or by always being the strong, capable one. 

Over time, though, these hidden parts don’t disappear—they find other ways to make themselves known. They show up in resentment, self-doubt, or feeling disconnected in relationships. 

When we gently acknowledge the parts of us that we’ve pushed aside, we create space.

If this resonates, therapy can offer a space to explore and reconnect with the parts of you longing to be seen 🌱

#selfacceptance #therapyhelps #transactionalanalysis #peoplepleasing #perfectionism #emotionalawareness #mentalhealth #emotionalwellbeing #relationaltrauma
Conflicts, mistakes, and hurt can happen in all re Conflicts, mistakes, and hurt can happen in all relationships. What matters most is how we 'repair'. An apology is the first step in that process.

A real apology comes from the Adult part of us - the part that is here and now, capable of taking responsibility without excuses. 

It acknowledges the impact of our actions, expresses genuine remorse, and includes a commitment to do better. 

It does not justify, minimise, or rush past the discomfort.

🌱What kind of apologies do you find most healing to receive? 

🌱Do they feel like true repair? 

#counselling #psychotherapy #selfworth #relationships #couplestherapy #psychotherapistsofinstagram #personalgrowth #mentalhealth #emotionalwellbeing
Anxiety doesn't just live in our minds. As we are Anxiety doesn't just live in our minds. As we are relational beings, it also shapes our relationships. It may look like this:

🌱 We have a strong belief that 'if we ask for help, we will be a burden'. We assume that we’ll push others away because we think our needs are 'too much'.

🌱 We seek reassurance constantly, wanting to know that we haven’t upset anyone. Our sense of being 'okay' depends on others being 'okay' with us.

🌱 We overthink our interactions – wondering if we said 'the wrong thing', or if we’re coming across as 'too much'.

🌱 We avoid difficult conversations – because the thought of confronting something uncomfortable feels just too overwhelming.

If you’re noticing these patterns in yourself, it might be time to give yourself the space to explore them. 

Whichever step you may take, please treat yourself with gentleness and compassion 🌱

#anxiety #relationships #mentalhealthawareness #selfawareness #overthinking #therapy #selfcompassion #emotionalhealth #communication
Perfectionism in relationships can show up in subt Perfectionism in relationships can show up in subtle ways; ways we might not even link to perfectionism. Some examples are:

🌱Struggling to express our needs because we don’t want to be ‘too much’
🌱 Overanalysing every text, every response, every silence
🌱 Feeling like we have to earn love by ‘doing it all’
🌱 Holding ourselves (and others) to impossibly high standards

Perfectionism can make relationships feel like a test we have to pass instead of a space where we can simply be.

Have you noticed perfectionism showing up in your relationships? What has helped you navigate it?

#perfectionism #relationships #mentalhealth #emotionalliteracy
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#therapy #counselling #benefitsoftherapy #psychoth #therapy #counselling #benefitsoftherapy #psychotherapy #boundaries #anxiety #relationships
Healing doesn’t happen in isolation. It unfolds in Healing doesn’t happen in isolation. It unfolds in the presence of those who truly meet us as we are. When we feel safe, valued, and understood, something shifts. Can you relate?🌱

#therapyworks #mentalwellbeing #selfgrowthjourney #healingispossible #selfworthmatters #relationshipsmatter #mentalhealthsupport #youarenotalone #emotionalwellness
A little reminder to give ourselves what we need.. A little reminder to give ourselves what we need...🌱

#motivation #selfcare #selfcompassion #mentalwellbeing
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For more resources or reflections, please visit my blog.

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