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Self-compassion means being kind to ourselves especially when the going gets tough. It is about relating to ourselves with understanding when we make mistakes or experience shortcomings. According to Prof. Kristin Neff (an educational psychologist and researcher), when we have self-compassion, ‘we give ourselves the same kindness and care we’d give to a good friend’. When…

In a healthy relationship, we express our thoughts and feelings in an open way without worrying about being judged or criticised. We accept that we all have different perspectives and our partner’s perspective is as valid as ours.  We feel a sense of equality (we don’t need to over-power or feel controlled). We feel…

Polyvagal Theory is a theory developed by Stephen Porges (first introduced in 1990s) that explains how our autonomic nervous system works. Although there has been some criticism of this theory, many people including professionals find it useful. According to Polyvagal theory, our autonomic nervous system has three states: social and safe, fight-or-flight (mobilisation) and…

You may wonder about the difference between counselling and psychotherapy. Although counselling and psychotherapy are sometimes used interchangeably and they both fall under the umbrella of ‘talking therapies’, there are also some differences.  Counselling usually focusses on an issue or a stressor (i.e. bereavement, divorce), that is current and is considered more short-term than psychotherapy.…

The first session is an introduction and opportunity to decide whether you and your therapist can work together. Your therapist will usually give you brief information regarding confidentiality, cancellations and payments. This will form part of how you will work together. Your therapist will usually ask you some questions to begin to get to…